I was about to connect to the WebEx meeting with a high share. The species where you want everything to go smoothly. When I signed up, I noticed that my usual virtual background Cisco Pride is still upstairs. I grazed.
The meeting was with the internal part of Cisco, the leader of the leader from the country with traditional culture. I thought about … and then quietly changed the background to neutral.
It could look like a small decision, but I remember how I felt immediately after: unsatisfactory. It says, as if I quietly refused the volume to my truth. It must not be exactly, but not quite my proper eith.
The moment was different because I spent years of encouraging others to accept authenticity, and yet I hesitated here. This background was not just for the show. It is for my values, my identity and community that I deeply care about.
And removed it.
Last year I hosted Pride in Singapore. The energy was strong. Our executive leaders Cisco were not just; Really he turned out. They presented, shared and stood with us. One colleague talked about his gender journey with such honesty. I still remember how quiet the room happened, not because people didn’t know what to say, but because we all just … they were moving deeply.
After the event, several people came to thank me for helping this space possible. And I remember thinking: that’s how the leadership looks like. But that night I was still coming back to that moment before the meeting as I overthrew the background down. And I asked my Lyself: Why did I feel like I had to hide?
Since then, waiting for the “right” time has stopped to be at work.
I started talking more. He shouldn’t have been courageous to be real. I started to share more of my personal journey, especially the dirty pieces that I once missed. I talked about the coaching of life I do out of work, what inclusion actually means, about moments when I didn’t feel safe and how I was still learning to show up.
And something moved.
Instead of distanced me, these conversations have created a connection. Colleagues from various teams and regions began to stretch. Some said, “A day never heard someone talk about it at work – thank you.” Others said, “How much in the same way you don’t know how to express it.”
At that time I realized: Visibility is not about loud. It’s simply that you’re fully alone at the moment. 
In Cisco there is no inclusion just a sentence on the wall. It shows all around us – a support report in the cottage, pine on the screen, our leaders appear for us and at that time they took to recognize someone’s courage, 30+, including the communities we created to support the connection and bring.
The work here reminded me that a company life may not feel performed or turned on. It can really be human. When we asked us to bring all our self, not just our work titles, we will show up in more detail. And work becomes more meaningful.
If you are someone who is considering where Cisco is a place where you can really be alone, here is what I say: You just look at the statement. Look at people. Notice how they appear each other.
And wherever you decide to go, try not to fit to fit. You will appreciate to take up the space as you are.
So yes, I still remember that webx call when I took the background Pride down. But these days I use this memory as a quiet reminder. Every time I decide to fully show, I don’t just do it for me. I help create a little more space for someone else to feel too. That’s what they feel. And that’s what we build here in Cisco.
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